1 post tagged “in flight”

How do you pass the time during a flight?  What do you bring in your carry-on?

Having never flown yet (oh, come on people, I'm Captain Haddock! I go by boat!) I wouldn't know, but I did spend the best part of my university life getting the national express long haul to places.  This taught me a lot about what to do when you find yourself stuck in a seat with hours to pass and random people surrounding you.  It was in fact the National Express that is responsible for me getting back into reading in a big way, I love it now, but for a long time didn't read anymore, then about 2002, I was getting a coach back from Glasgow and killing time in the bus stations WHSmith when I picked up a copy of Hugh Sebag Montefiore's Enigma.  I didn't get that far though it, but far enough to get me hooked on reading again, and I never travel without a book anymore.

Another thing I learned from my days on the buses was the inevitability that in a journey that involves three stages of several hours each you will end up, at some point, being confronted by someone who is chatty.  It's safe to assume that this will never be the very cute Canadian girls in the seats in front, and will always be whoever is oldest or drunkest.  If you happen to be within a three seat radius of both the oldest and the drunkest person, there is every chance you will end up in some kind of random, bizzare, conversational menage-a-trois that would weird out even the most kinky of chat line operators.

While on the subject of conversation with these people, it's fair to assume that someone will offer you some form of food or drink.  Don't take it.  Ever.  Remember, no matter how kindly the old lady is, she made the sandwiches herself, and you have no idea if she has any personal hygiene in the slightest, or if she happens to cook her cats and pass them off as pork.  Neither does the fact that the drunk has offered you a swig of his vodka mean that in any circumstances you should accept said vodka, you should instead heed the advice he gave you only moments before and not get drawn into drink.

Of course, if reading and conversing with your fellow passengers fails to keep you amused for the length of your journey, there is another thing you could try, and that is the patience game!  You challenge yourself to see how many times you can remain calm while the person behind ignores calls despite the high volume of their Las Ketchup ring tone.